O Little Star of Bethlehem Barbie

O Little Star of Bethlehem Barbie

In elementary school, we had a Christmas concert every year.  One notable time my class sang The Coventry Carol.  All of the students sat on stage for the whole show and each class would rise as it took its turn to sing.  This was much easier than marshaling the children in and out for each song.

The school stage had two short flights of stairs leading down to the gym floor with a skirting wall that extended to hide the stairs from the audience.  Someone rigged a platform by putting some boards across the top of the wall for my class.  There was room for 24 kids in two rows, twelve stage left and twelve stage right.  I was kid 25 so my chair was on the gym floor and I stood on it when it was our turn to sing.  I was tall but the arrangement had my head at waist level to the others.

No one else from my family was performing that year.  We had a new baby at home so my mother could not attend.  Dad tried to escape too.  He suggested that I need not go.  This was craziness.  I had practiced.  My class needed me.  Dad suggested he could drop me off at the school and pick me up when it was over.  No, no.  Everyone's parents would be there.  What if he only came for my one song?  It wasn't just one song.  We would all be singing O Canada at the start and God Save the Queen at the end!

My adorable, long-suffering Dad came....  and stayed for the whole concert. 

All I Want for Christmas Barbie

All I Want for Christmas Barbie

It is hard to keep  Christmas secrets when you live in a family.  After every shopping expedition you have to sneak into the house and up to your  room to wrap and hide the gifts before someone sees you.  

My father, the world's worst gift shopper, took my four-year-old sister and me to choose a gift for our mother.  Mom had mentioned that she would like a pair of kid leather gloves to match her new purse.  It was a successful trip and dad explained that we must not tell what we had bought.  It was a secret until Christmas.  He repeated many times on the way home that the kid gloves were a secret.  We promised.

But Christmas is unbearably exciting when you are four years old and we weren't out of our coats before my sister blurted the news to Mom.  "We bought you kid's mitts!"

Barbie's lips are sealed.  She will never tell you what I got for you this year.

Rola Bola Barbie

Rola Bola Barbie

Barbie is dressed as Pierrot, a sad clown whose origins stem from the traditions of seventeenth century entertainers in Paris.  Pierrot is a sad-faced clown, a mime, who pines for Columbine.  His love is unrequited and while Columbine may flirt with Pierrot, she always chooses Harlequin.
Barbie is not very concerned with this aspect of Pierrot (she has Ken) but she is trying to learn some of the circus skills that the very best clowns possess.

Circus skills are divided into three categories (according to the Hovey Burgess pedagogy).  They are juggling, equilibristics and vaulting.  Rola bola is an example of an equilibristic skill.  It is a balancing act often combined with juggling.

Life is a balancing act often combined with juggling.  That is not a new or very perceptive analogy but it's really deep thinking for Barbie.

First Ball for Barbie

Dressed for the Ball Barbie

Barbie is dressed for her first ball.  There will be champagne, candlelight and caviar.  She will dance with many dashing partners.  All will comment on her beauty and she will be described as the belle of the ball.

My first ball was the soccer dance for a team of twelve-year-old boys.  My across-the-driveway neighbour asked me.  I was so excited, I left him standing outside while I screamed in joy and jumped around our kitchen.   Poor guy, I know his mother made him ask me.

My mother took me to Jacobson's to buy a suitable dress.  It was blue wool with pretty embroidery and it was as itchy as can be.  I wore a slip that almost solved the problem.  I remember nylon stockings and I wore my everyday shoes, solid brown Oxfords with scuffed toes and wear marks on the sides from my roller skates.

The dance was in the school gym on Saturday afternoon.  Our gym lights had two settings, off and glaring.  The chaperones chose the less romantic of the two.

There were refreshments, sandwich quarters, cake squares and very sweet beverages.

They played dance music on a record player and we stood morosely for a while.  Some of the boys horsed around and then some girls bravely danced together.  "Twist and Shout"  was popular and as long as I ignored my date I was fine.  Spending time with him was just too awkward.  He lived next door for Pete's sake.  How would I face him in the morning if I accidentally touched him while we were dancing together?

Finally realizing this group of kids were too young for  a sock hop, one of the parents suggested a variation of Blind Man's Bluff where the blindfolded boy repeated "Rachel, where are you?" and the blindfolded girl answered "Here."  A game! my competitive instincts were raised.  I am proud to say I found him in mere seconds.  I think the idea was that he would search for me while I eluded him but I decided that shortest time was the goal and I wanted to win.

I waited several years before I went to my next dance. It wasn't much better.

Rodeo Clown Barbie

Rodeo Clown Barbie

A rodeo is a competition  rooted in  the profession of cattle herding.  Rounding up the cattle to brand the calves, check the herd,  and move them to other pastures or market are all important aspects of a herder's work.  At a rodeo, the competitors rope and tie the cattle,  demonstrate lariat skills and for fun, I guess, ride the bulls.

I'm sure you have seen the machines that simulate the bucking of an enraged bull.  They were a big fad in the late 70's and a feature of the movie Urban Cowboy.   A real bull is a terrifying and angry beast weighing up to a ton.  The people who ride them get thrown off and then the rodeo clowns move in to distract the bull from the fallen rider.   

Rodeo clowns wear loose clothing designed to be torn off.  Underneath they wear protective gear.  There may be a barrelman who has a large, strong, padded barrel to jump in to escape from the bull.  The clowns might heckle the emcee, the competitors or people in the audience.

Usually there is a team of clowns working together.  Barbie relies on agility and speed to distract the animal and to escape safely.   As you know, she doesn't have to be the fastest clown, she just has to be faster than any one of the other clowns on her team.

Barbie's Muslin

 Barbie's Muslin

At St. Andrew's Junior High School, the two grade 8 home economics teachers specialized.  One taught cooking, the other sewing.  At the beginning of the session, the students were sent to buy a pattern, fabric, zipper and thread.  The first class, we pinned the paper pattern together.   Our teacher expected us to take off our dresses, don the pinned pattern over our slips and take turns going into the class powder room.  There she'd adjust the fit of the pattern including the depth and angle of the bust darts.

I am a prude and this was far beyond my comfort zone so I eluded her and made my jumper without adjustments.  Shame, I might have learned something.  For years now I have made clothes and often been disappointed when they don't look right on me despite my best efforts.

But last month I took a course in pattern drafting and made a muslin that fits perfectly.  You know the rule about new skills; watch it, do it,  teach it. I put my skills to good use and taught Barbie.  This is what she made.

Barbie Adams

Barbie Adams

The Party Dress Book, by Mary Adams, an American designer, inspired this.  Mary Adams' clothes are vibrant scene-stealers.  Her wedding dresses are symphonies of colour that command center stage.  The skirts bounce with layers of glorious shades reflecting the full spectrum of rainbow hues.

Some Mary Adams designs that I particularly love include a white wedding dress with a ruffled deep blue underskirt and one with many crinolines in shades of red. I also like the ones inspired by Marie Antoinette 's wardrobe.

Barbie put on this dress and it made her want to twirl around and around until she was dizzy. 

Superdad Ken

Superdad Ken

My father was the best kind of father, involved.  He did his share of the housework and childcare because he wanted to.  My mother's agoraphobia often kept her at home so we went to the beach, to picnics, to the Sunday free swim at the local  pool and to the movies with dad. 

There were times in our lives when he had three jobs.  He was in the military and often away at sea.  He also sometimes had a weekend job repairing televisions and sometimes he taught television repair two nights a week for a continuing education program.  Keeping five children cavity-free and in shoes cost a lot but I don't remember his absences.  He always disparaged people who offered presents instead of presence.

My husband is also a loving, caring, involved father.

And Superdad Ken is the same kind of father, involved and perfect.

Tall Ships Barbie

Tall Ships Barbie

I must go down to the seas again, to the lonely sea and the sky,
And all I ask is a tall ship and a star to steer her by,
And the wheel's kick and the wind's song and the white sail's shaking,
And a grey mist on the sea's face, and a grey dawn breaking. 
John Masefield

The summer I was 9 my father earned his bosun's license.  In celebration, he took my younger brother and me for a sail around Halifax harbour in a sturdy whaler.  A submarine was coming into Halifax harbour just on the other side of George's Island.  We called excitedly to go see the submarine.  Dad was excited too, I guess, because he threw the tiller the wrong way.  The boat rolled over and lay in the water with the keel pointing at the sky.  We  clambered on the hull and she rolled upright.  We jumped in but couldn't bail fast enough.  The boat rolled once more and we were again clinging to the hull bottom.  Poor Dad was frantic and clutched us by the collar handles of our life jackets but my brother and I were not worried.  The whaler wallowed upside down in the harbour until a tug arrived to rescue us. 

My fearless sibling called as a man reached to gaff one of our lines, "Quick, take a photo so we can be in the newspaper."

 Dad never took us sailing again but, should the opportunity arise,  Barbie is suitably dressed for a day on a yacht.

Moonbeam Barbie

Moonbeam Barbie

I mentioned in an earlier post that I am a fan of L.M. Montgomery. I read Anne of Green Gables for the first time when I was 8.  The books weren't always easy to find in those days before Amazon and Indigo but I read as many of them as I could.

This quote from Emily's Quest, has haunted me. 
But he told her she looked like "the moonbeam of a blue summer night" in that gown. 

"That gown" was a long-time desire of Emily's, first expressed in Emily Climbs.

 If ever I can buy that one silk dress I know what it is going to be like. Not black or brown or navy blue--sensible, serviceable colours, such as New Moon Murrays always wear--oh, dear, no! It is to be of shot silk, blue in one light, silver in others, like a twilight sky, glimpsed through a frosted window-pane.

Do you think of your clothes that way?  Barbie does.

Barbie Capulet

Barbie Capulet

Zefferelli's Romeo and Juliet was released to great acclaim in 1968.  I saw it at the Paramount Theater in Halifax and was completely undone by the tragic story of the star-crossed lovers.

As the story unfolded, sniffs were heard throughout the darkened theater followed by muffled sobs.  The music rose to a crescendo (amazing score by Nino Rota)  and by the time the astoundingly beautiful Olivia Hussey stabbed herself in the heart the soaring soundtrack had been drowned out by the audience's anguished wails.

I was not immune to the hysteria.  The lights came up and the tears continued to pour down my cheeks.  I went to the ladies' room to wash my face.  One of the ushers was standing in front of the bank of sinks.  She was desperately trying to control her emotions.  She caught my eye in the mirror.  "I have seen this movie at least twenty times and I still can't stop crying."

Barbie Capulet is a lot more sensible than her sister Juliet and a lot less emotional than the usher and me.

 

Sou'wester Barbie

Sou'wester Barbie

When Barbie camps, the weather is perfect, balmy even.

When I camp, it rains.  I don't even have to sleep out.  One beautiful evening, we decided to take our three children for a short paddle on the river in our back yard.  Everyone put on a PDF and we floated downstream about 100 meters in peace.  Then a huge cloud appeared overhead and we found ourselves in the middle of a thunder storm.

Another time, we were traveling with a hiking group from Capetown to the Fish River Canyon in Namibia.  The bus stopped at an abandoned gas station for the night. It was the routine that everyone sleep outside in the field.  No one had tents because we were in a desert.  It hadn't rained there since forever.  The downpour lasted all night so we all slept cramped in our seats on the bus.

We went canoe camping in Temiskaming for a week.  It rained hard every single day and every single night.  Some portages had thigh-deep puddles to wade through as we carried the canoe on our heads.  I slept with a rivulet running through my tent and into my sleeping bag.  The sun did come out (once),  and we pulled to shore to hang the wet bedding to dry.

We hiked in the Wilderness National Park in South Africa.  We went in winter and were the only hikers on the controlled trail.  Of course, it rained.  Our safety matches could only be lit on the special box they came in.  The wax coating kept the matches dry but the box disintegrated in the rain.  No matches, no fire, no cooking.  Dry biscuit mix may be nourishing but it tastes like chalk.

Barbie is ready to go camping in a rain suit, yellow rain boots and a matching sou'wester, just in case.

Retirement Barbie

Retirement Barbie

I celebrated the last day of school by retiring.  I didn't announce my news until all the students had gone.  I don't like fuss and besides, it was their day to rejoice in their achievements.

My colleagues, who are creative, energetic, entertaining people felt differently and a few days later staged a Barbie Retirement Party for me.

We had pink balloons, Barbie tattoos, Barbie kites, a Barbie tablecloth and paper plates and Barbie games.   I was gifted with a pile of nude Barbies.  But just look at dessert! 

Canada Day Barbie

Canada Day Barbie

I acknowledge that being born is Canada is like winning a  lottery but I abhor jingoism  and I cringe when people 'wave the flag'.  South of the border, people seem to be much more comfortable with expressing their patriotism.

I was in a wonderful jazz restaurant in the U.S. once and the final number before the break was a medley of songs including America, the Beautiful and It's a Grand Old Flag.  The audience stood with their hands on their hearts, deep in the moment.  I had to leave.  My status as guest in the country had been overwritten and I had become an alien.

That being said,  every year on Canada Day,  Barbie and I wear red and white.  No temporary tattoos or flags painted on the forehead are allowed, but we do acknowledge the day with a certain sartorial flair.

Hula Dancer Barbie

Hula Dancer Barbie

Halifax and Dartmouth used to celebrate Natal Day separately, a week apart.  Dartmouth had dories on the sidewalks where a service club served free chowder for breakfast.  There was a parade in the morning, a regatta on Lake Banook in the afternoon and fireworks in the evening.

The year I was 6, a hula dancer who lived in my neighbourhood approached my mother to ask if I would be on her float in the parade. She had noticed me because I have skin that tans easily and dark brown, curly hair. She danced in a grass skirt in the center of the float while three other little girls and I sat on the corners and waved our arms about in a way that was meant to suggest hula dancing.

I arrived at the marshaling area early wearing a bathing suit.  They added a lei, a grass skirt, flowers for my hair, anklets and wristlets.  July in Dartmouth can be warm and sunny or cold and rainy.  That year was definitely cold and rainy.  Rather than hide our costumes under coats, we wore clear dry cleaner bags.  And so began the coldest Natal Day of my life...until a week later,  when we did it again for the Halifax celebration.

Barbie never suffers from the cold or heat but, let's face it, she can't pretend to hula dance with her arms.

Medieval Barbie

Medieval Barbie

Medieval Barbie is wearing a dress made of dark green velvet with an underskirt of very fragile gold metallic brocade.  She is standing by the dark pink peonies that came into bloom yesterday.

Medieval fairs are very popular attractions in the summer and there is one near here every year in the hamlet called Osgoode.  Here one can watch jousting, a hand-fasting and see crafts people ply their ancient trades.  There will be puppet shows, magicians, dancers, and a murder mystery dinner.  You can buy jewellery,  bread and honey, clothing and armour. 

Barbie will fit right in.   Fit might not be exactly the right word; she's a little shorter than most of the other fair-goers but you know what I mean. 

Spring Flowers Barbie

Spring Flowers Barbie

Siberian irises are among the earliest blooms in my garden.  They are lovely mauve flowers with yellow accents on the petals.  They are the perfect flower for people who don't have green thumbs.  Siberian irises are resistant to soft rot and iris borers.  They are hardy to Zone 3 and don't fall down in the rain like peonies.

Barbie's dress is a light mauve with yellow/green beading on the collar and drop waist.  You can't see the pretty trim at the bottom of her skirt because I am not a photographer.  I realized as I perched on my makeshift seat that I kept posing Barbie with a telephone pole growing out of her head. (You can still see the pole on the left).

I did try other angles and vantage points but Barbie has little patience.   I noticed her smile was increasingly plastic so I had to make do with the shots I had.

Bridal Wreath Barbie

Bridal Wreath Barbie

Barbie hasn't had a wedding in weeks!  But this weekend the bridal wreath spirea was in full bloom and if that isn't a reason to get married I don't know what is.

You'll notice Barbie's wedding gown is not white.  Vera Wang has featured entire collections of non-white wedding dresses including a series of  red tones and this dress is a tribute to her work. In the movie Time Again, Rachel MacAdams wears a red wedding dress, not by Vera Wang but it is a great dress. 

Queen Victoria's wedding dress was white and started a fashion that has been copied many, many times.  The biggest problem with white of course is it is so hard to keep it clean and red wine leaves such a hideous, conspicuous stain.  

A little free advice to brides, stick to white wine until all the pictures have been taken. And don't eat the salad at dinner in case a leaf becomes lodged in your teeth.  You can thank me later.

Barbie Karenina

Barbie Karenina

Clothing fashions take us from the scanty clothing of the Roaring Twenties and the Mod Sixties to the opulent extravagance of the aristocracy during any number of reigns.

In L.M. Montgomery's Anne of Green Gables,  Marilla comments when she sees Anne's new dress that 'there's enough material in those sleeves to make a waist'.  But fashion, however ridiculous, can never be ignored.  In Emily of New Moon (same author)  Emily notes that even her dour Aunt Elizabeth wears a bustle, 'just  a little one'.

The 2012 movie, Anna Karenina, was a symphony of dresses and bustles made with layers upon layers of fabric.  While I could not imagine actually wearing a skirt as huge and a bodice as tight as the ones  worn in the  film, Barbie loves to dress like a princess. 

Achy Breaky Barbie

Achy Breaky Barbie

I learned to line dance to Billy Ray Cyrus' Achy Breaky heart in the 90's at an aerobics class.  I took a line dancing course ten years later and  I learned it again.  A few years ago, I started line dancing once a week with a group of patient friends and I learned it for a third time.

Things have progressed and I now sort of know a lot more dances.  I am always an eighth beat behind the group and often finish a turn facing in the wrong direction.

Barbie does everything with ease and grace.  She never misses a beat, always turns with precision and never panics during the bridge.  She can clap on the off-beat and count to eight over and over.

She's dressed for dancing in a blue suede skirt and vest and her favourite gingham shirt.

Barbie gives me an envious, achy-breaky heart.

Barbie Mercer

Barbie Mercer

If you are a fan of Rick Mercer, you have already seen the RMR 7 day forecast on You Tube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wkDvqQKGgDA. 

The sketch neatly captures the fruitless hope and the endless despair of what was a brutal winter and what is becoming a cold and dreary spring.  But let me introduce Barbie Mercer, a vernal goddess.  She is dressed in pink and gold and has celestial wings to remind us that in some parts of the world spring arrived on time.  She is a beacon of hope for the warmth of the summer to come (cross your fingers on that one).  She evokes the gentle colours of flowers and the soft breezes of a warm night. 

She is a complete fantasy. 

It Came Upon a Midnight Clear Barbie

It Came Upon a Midnight Clear Barbie

A debate that occurred regularly in our house could have been called "French Christmas or English Christmas?"  My mother came from Acadian stock and my father's parents were British.

My mother felt Christmas began with everyone who was old enough attending  midnight mass. After mass, you woke up the little ones and the réveillon began.  Rabbit pie was the featured treat.  People went to bed at dawn and turkey dinner was served in the evening of the 25th.

My father wanted everyone to hang stockings and go to bed on Christmas Eve.  Then we could wake up early to open gifts.  (As a child, I interpreted early as 3 AM, not popular but in retrospect a nice meld of the two traditions).  There was children's mass at 9 and we could play with our new toys all day until the turkey dinner was served.

When we were little the English tradition prevailed but, over time, the scheduling got more French.  My brother was an altar boy and my mother was so proud she made him a cassock and surplice of his own.  There was some in the sacristy but they were of dubious hygiene, often needed repair and the right size was not always available.

When he was 9 or possibly 10 years old, he was asked to serve at Midnight Mass.  In those days, mass was in Latin and after the gospel there was a long prayer called the Confiteor.  The altar boys would crouch, heads down, on the floor and recite it with the priest.  The congregation knelt and bowed their heads.  At the end of the prayer, we lifted our heads and three of the four altar boys did too.

But not my brother, he'd fallen asleep. 

Spring Solstice Barbie

Spring Solstice Barbie

A super moon will herald spring this weekend.  It is unfortunate it will be a new moon so there will be no spectacular moonrise to fill me with awe.  The solar system is also planning an eclipse for the spring solstice but it won't be visible in my part of the world.  Unlike the hero in Carol King's song You're so Vain, Barbie will not be traveling to see a 'total eclipse of the sun'.

Anyway, nothing could eclipse Barbie!

Mardi Gras Barbie

Mardi Gras Barbie

What an abject failure this Barbie is!  How did I fail thee?  Let me count the ways.

I wanted a Barbie that would capture the exuberance and life in the celebration of Mardi Gras.  I wanted bright colours, a carnival feel in the ribboned skirt and lightness from the feathered wings; extravagance in the silky skirt and wantonness from the low-cut bodice.

She does have a purple crinoline.  Purple underwear, orange dress, feathered wings, close enough.  We'll ignore the rest.

Coureur des Bois Ken

Coureur des Bois Ken

The Europeans who came to Canada 600 years ago found wealth in many forms.   Cod were so plentiful you could practically walk across the water on their backs and Jacques Cartier wrote that sometimes the cod "stayed his ships".

By the early 1700's, Great Britain's mighty fleets faced a shortage of timber suitable for building new ships.  The forests of the New World were exploitable.

For three hundred years (until silk hats became popular around 1850) hats made from felted beaver fur were fashionable.  The lucrative fur trade was a driving force in the European invasion of Canada and it was powered by intrepid adventurers working for themselves or the Hudson's Bay Company.

They (coureurs des bois, voyageurs, pedleurs, men of the North, eaters of lard)  worked 12 to 14  hour days.  They tended to be small and very strong.  They canoed and portaged trade goods into the interior and then brought the furs back out.  It cannot have been an easy life  and yet 14,000 men made their living this way.

For most, this was seasonal work but there were those who stayed in the woods all winter, hivernants.

In a CBC radio skit, someone asked when the Métis arrived in Canada and a First Nations actor answered wryly, "9 months after the French."